Bain Mattox

12.09.04 - Missouri:

Well, we woke up this morning and found ourselves in a situation we never thought we would: WE WERE IN MISSOURI! Funny thing about Missouri, the two sole civilized sites this state has to offer (St. Louis and Kansas City) are located on opposite borders of the state, barely close enough to even count as Missouri anyway. What then lies between these two distant beacons of fine American culture you ask? Not much aside from endless cow pastures, the "World's Largest McDonald's" ... oh, and Springfield: tonight's stop.

The small, almost nameless towns always turn out to be amazing. From the moment we loaded into the Rockwell and had time to walk around the block (a.k.a. the entire town), we knew this was THE place to play. I mean both ALTER BRIDGE and GWAR are scheduled to play there this month. Slayer canceled. Um... damn? ...

So before we got up to play we agreed to "up the rock" element of tonight's show so at least the handful of folks there would be fully entertained. "Upping the rock" is a show biz term for a conscious effort to come as close to the stage energy of a 1984 Van Halen arena rock show. Four songs into the set I did not expect to see two quite drunken, quite forward young ladies finagle their way onstage to rip Bain's shirt off his back. And I mean RIP! They actually used teeth at one point to get it all the way off. Bain, playing accordion and singing, didn't miss a beat. The two ladies then flashed us and disappeared. George summed up my own astonishment by turning immeadiately and asking "What the hell just happened?" I don't know George. I don't know.

12.10.04 - Oklahoma City:
There she is, boys! The Oklahoma City skyline came into view as quickly as it went out. That's right ... on to the suburbs to the Classic Rock Cafe!

My favorite part of arriving at a new venue in a foreign town is quickly assessing the clientele in order to determine the night's set list, and what songs will provide maximum entertainment for everyone involved. Tonight's performance would probably best without the darker rock songs like Jet Black Ash if you catch my drift. I just wished we knew some REO Speedwagon!

The response we got was suprisingly great. Just when you think perhaps the crowd didn't dig it, a hand slaps you on the back. The crowd, mostly there to see local cover band Subrosa, must have enjoyed it. We sold CD's to nearly everyone, and CD's on the road mean FOOD and GAS money. For example, 1 CD = 9 double-cheesburgers or 4.5 gallons of 87 octane. We were even cornered in the parking lot from a woman allegedly from a division of Capitol records wanting our contact information. Everyone these days works at SOME division of SOME record label. Sure lady ... sure ... Of course we gave her our card!

12.11.04 - Stillwater, Oklahoma:
We weren't supposed to play tonight, but it's SATURDAY: the prime night in anytown, anywhere on Earth. With that in mind, we woke up in Stillwater, where we stayed after the Oklahoma City show the night before. We were at Bain's gracious cousin's apartment surrounded by hay fields under the close gaurd of taxadermied deer heads. When you are in a touring band with no money, you quickly learn and compile the whereabouts of ALL friends and family no matter how distant. Five guys with baby-boomer parents makes for one hell of a network! Sofie, Bulgaria ... we got a place to stay.

After lunch we decided to sneak ourselves onto a show tonight regardless of how. We flipped through the local entertainment rag and found a full-page solution: The Lost Trailers playing at the Dirty Dog Tavern ... conveniently without an opening band. Hoping they remembered us from when we played together at the Geogia Theater a few months ago, we went to the club. On stage was a bunch of unfamiliar, rented gear. Apparently they had just had their trailer stolen. Oh... the irony.

The guys were nice enough to let us play an hour in exchange for a few beers. I love being approached by a 7-foot, 300-pound man named Jed ... "You guys aren't from around here are you?" What gave it away, Jed? I'm not wearing a camoflaged hunting jumper?

Posted by David Eduardo at December 20, 2004 02:37 PM